Bit more of a serious post today!
Panic attacks are one of the things I hate the most about my anxiety and no matter how hard I try to stop them, they always seem to happen at the most inconvenient times; nights out, family meals, during films and half way up mountains. (yes a mountain…)
I’ll just give you an example to put things in to context. Recently i spent an extended weekend after christmas with family in the Lake district. Nice couple of days away, family all around you, drinking good quality champagne and the odd vodka and coke, it was good, I had a blast.
Second day in some of us decided to go on a 6 mile walk up to the top of a mountain and back down again and meet the rest of them in Ambleside. Now on normal circumstances i wouldn’t of had a panic attack but unfortunately due to some reasons i did. 😦
Me being such an anxious and not very confident person i started overthinking things, that morning decided to send that really familiar text to the boyfriend asking if every things okay! (Seriously i always send this text to him, Im pretty sure I annoy the hell out of him when I do that!) Anyway, my dad has been having some heart problems recently and he’s been thinking he’s going to die and naturally that worries me. Anyway he decided to go all macho and wanted to do this 6 mile walk that consisted of steep hills and unsteady terrain. I was worried all the way round. When we got to the final mile or two (the steepest bit) I started to panic! In my head i was thinking ‘what happens if he dies up here. theres no help close’ or ‘theres nothing i can do if something goes wrong!’. This eventually got too much and when my dad started asking questions i just snapped. I started hyperventilating, my chest got tight, I started crying and my brain went crazy with thoughts!
He explained to me that he wanted to do this for his benefit and prove to himself that he could do what he used to do in his childhood (he was a walker). So I eventually calmed down and we completed the walk. At the end I was so proud of my dad that he completed it, BUT at the same time I was angry at him for putting me through that!
The way I normally cope with a panic attack is I take myself from the situation, i go get fresh air and try to calm myself. It often helps to have someone there to talk to you about everything else apart from whats happening. (Although normally someone always asks if your okay and that really doesn’t help!). But sometimes there isn’t anyone there!
I went to the doctors recently to try and get this clamped down and they gave me some pills to cope with it, Beta Blockers, they really do help, calm me down, slow my heart rate. I only take these in certain situations though. (To be truthful im scared to take them! I don’t know why though, they are there to help me!)
All in all i am thankful for the people i have around me that are there for me and understand what I’m going through. Each and everyone one of them had helped in some way or another and I love them for that! 🙂
If anyone else has any ways to try and cope with panic attacks I would love to hear from you! Leave a comment below!