Help for others…

The last post I wrote was me apologising for not writing and I promised I would write more. I didn’t stick to what I had promised, and I again… apologise. It seems all I’m doing at the moment is apologising.

My anxiety is at a all time high and all I seem to be doing is arguing and worrying. Things have gotten out of hand with my anxiety and I have come to the conclusion that I really do need help. Outside of my friends/ family and boyfriend. They try there best but to be honest it doesn’t help. They may distract me for a couple of hours but its still there nagging in the back of my mind.

Morbid thought.. Anxiety is like the grim reaper… always there, it never leaves, at any one time it could happen. WOW…. Deep.

Anyway I thought I’d make a post about what people can do to help people with anxiety. I saw this article on Facebook – Really? Of all places! But as I read it, it was speaking the truth and everything that I was reading I was agreeing with. I have taken the ones which are most relevant and put them in my own words!

So here are the tips!

1. They are more than just their anxiety.
I for one don’t like how modern day society likes to put people in groups. You see it a lot in school. The popular people, geeks, nerds, smokers, sporty people ect ect ect… When I was in school I used to class my friendship group as the ‘normal’ people because we wasn’t nerdy/ geeky and we wasn’t popular. Anyway what I’m getting at is that people with anxiety hate being put into a category. They are normal.

2. They get tired easily.
BOY! Don’t I know about this one. Danny always calls me a slug, basically whenever we hang out i’m either laid in his bed or mine. I am constantly tired. The best way i can explain it is that were always tense, but its timed by 1000000. Always on edge and that tires out the body and the mind.

3. They can get overwhelmed easily.
This happens to me all the time, especially at this moment in time. Exams are just around the corner, coursework deadlines, helping plan my mums wedding and my constant battle with my mind. I get overwhelmed and sometimes I just need to cry or mope. In my eyes the best thing other people can do is to keep In mind that if your off out and your with your friend, the stimuli that you enjoy could easily overwhelm said person with anxiety.

4. They are well aware their anxiety is often irrational.
Same as point 2 I know this one well. I’m constantly asking my boyfriend if everything between us is okay Or if we have an argument its probably over something so stupid, but my mind thinks of all the totally irrational thoughts constantly. The littlest thing could set me off and ill just snap. The thing is, we know where irrational, the best thing to do is to be compassionate, understanding and support them.

5. They don’t need someone constantly asking ‘are you okay?’ while there panicking.
I really despise this. Everyone always asks if your okay and 9/10 times your not and that 3 worded sentence makes everything worse. You should already know the answer, their heart is pounding a million miles an hour, their hands are all clammy, their chest is tightening and from all the adrenaline our minds just sink into a limbo and we block everything out. Instead of asking that stupid question. Say things like:
– Remember your breathing
– Remind them about previous techniques they’ve tried before and its helped.
– I’m here if you need me
Also if they want to be alone, leave them alone. I know I hate it if I wanna be alone and my friend/ family member won’t leave.

6. They can find it hard to let go.
Its hard for people with anxiety to let go of previous things that have happened or been said/ done. It’s always in the back of their minds. There probably wondering when it’ll happen again. The brain just doesn’t like to let it go, then we get stuck in a cycle. The best thing to do is not to give them a hard time! Its not fair!

I tried to relate these points to me so people could relate to the point. I don’t know if I’ve explained it right as it is a very tricky topic to talk about to people who don’t suffer from anxiety and they will never really understand.

Yours truly
Sophie x

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